Sleep training pt 4 – Sleep School

Week three of trying to get this sleep business happening. We’re staying in the Mother and Baby Unit at Masada hospital for five days. I had applied to attend the five day residential program before arranging for the sleep consultant, and arranged for the sleep consultant to come once I found out that it was a four week waiting list to get into Masada. Given the improvements in Master Z’s night sleeps (and therefore mine), I wasn’t at the same point of desperation when I had my pre-admission interview. I spent last week vacillating whether to come or not, but finally decided that I would. I still didn’t feel that I really knew some good settling techniques, I wasn’t 100% happy with the timing of leaving Master Z to cry and whilst I was feeling much better than I had been, I could feel that we were still just one bad day or night away from tears and hopelessness. I want a much bigger buffer than one day or night! Also, when I explained to the nurse in my pre-admission interview that we’d had a sleep consultant, and I didn’t want to be taking the place of someone who needed it more, she was very reassuring, telling me that thee was still plenty that they could help with, if I wanted to come and that they wouldn’t be wondering why I was here if Master Z was sleeping through the night.

Whilst we’re still not ‘there’ yet, and the afternoon sleeps are still just a session in horribleness, I am so so so glad that we came. If we have similar issues with next bub, I will totally come here again. However, I am glad that I did wait until I was absolutely ready and knew that this was the best thing for Master Z and I. I am also glad that we did get the sleep consultant and that we were already two weeks in to the process when we came. I think all of the above has added up to it being a bit easier for me to let go and trust in the staff, and certainly made it possible for to just clear out on the Tuesday afternoon, rather than hover outside Master Z’s room with the nurse. I know what the afternoon “nap” is like and I was very ready to take a break from it and let someone else deal with it for an afternoon while I took a much needed walk.

The program divides into two sections: the first two days where the priority is for both mums and bubs to catch up on sleep. The staff look after the bubs during their sleeptimes, allowing the mums to also sleep, or rest, or do whatever they need to, to relax (if they can – it is hard when you can hear your darling little one crying/grizzling). At night, Mums have the option of taking sleeping tablets and are encouraged to wear ear plugs. The next three days are for mums to practice, practice, practice the settling techniques, and for bubs to continue to learn their new routine.

The first two days, well, one and a half really, as admission is late afternoon on the Monday, were fantastic. I lapped up the ability to leave the settling to the staff and took every opportunity to rest. The next days have been long – it is now Thursday and we have one more day and two more nights.

The unexpected benefit of coming here has been the connections. It is so nice to meet other mums who understand and also have babies who wake early (4, 5am), catnap and just don’t sleep as much as they need to. It’s comforting to have others around who are also struggling with the same or similar issues, and who are going through the same emotional wrenches at the same time. Doing this at home was very lonely. Now I don’t feel so alone with it.

All mums are offered an opportunity for a massage and the opportunity to see a psychiatrist or psychologist. After hearing good reports about the psychiatrist, I spoke to one of the nurses about getting an appointment. I only just got an appointment, first thing this morning and she was exactly what I needed. I’ve wanted to see someone to discuss various issues – mum, difficult pregnancy, breastfeeding – but didn’t know where to start to find someone that I clicked with. I’ve seen a few people over the years at different times, but no-one that I’ve been inspired to go back to, until now.

She works in a clinic with various medical practitioners who specialise in pediatric and women’s health. Somewhat fortuitous considering that I have lost faith in my GP for Master Z and most of the recommended doctors in our area are not taking new clients. The clinic is the other side of the city from us, so we’ll see how it goes as far as using them for GP/pediatrician, but I’m excited to at least try them out. At any rate I will continue to see her periodically.